Every night before I lay Fisher down, I am overwhelmed with a crushing feeling of love. It almost knocks me over at times because the surge is so strong. I feel his sweet and soft body. And rub his fuzzy, thin hair. And I am absolutely overwhelmed.
So I try and focus all my love into my words. And I quietly repeat, “You’re my angel baby. Momma loves you” until I feel enough of my love has been expelled that I can leave the room in peace.
Then I quietly close the door.
Of course, if you’ve been around us lately you know, the irony of this routine of ours and my repetitive love words for him is this: Fisher’s not always an angel right now.
Hitting is currently one of his favorite hobbies. :) And screaming of course. And just within the last week. Flailing his body back onto the ground as I try and take him from something he doesn’t want to leave. (You’re welcome for the show if you were at karate last night.)
And maybe it’s because he’s my third. But something about these unpleasantries in some WEIRD way doesn’t frustrate me as much as it once would have.
Instead, they all just remind me of how much of a”baby” he still is.
And how much in this world. He is in fact pretty powerless to do anything for himself.
Innocent to the immaturity of his behavior. And utterly dependent on me.
And as a result, I love him all the more for it.
2000 years ago. The God of this world entered into the world he created in baby form, just like my son.
Because unlike all other babies. He wasn’t actually powerless. Instead he was already GOD. And he could have come into the world…
But instead, he came as a baby. Born in a manger with animals. That I’m sure stunk.
You’ve heard the song, “I wish that I could be like the cool kids.” Well he certaintly didn’t choose the cool kid entrance.
He chose the misfit route.
And if you study the Bible, you find that so much of who God is, is that confusing contradiction to the typical human way of thinking. The book of Matthew is FULL of those amazing concepts and teaching. Here is just a paraphrase of some of Jesus’ teachings from that book.
“The first shall be last. The last shall be first. (Which my boys totally cannot grasp yet. But I’m here first, so how am I not the first?!)
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.
When you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets.
Don’t store up your treasures on earth, store them in heaven.”
When I ponder these things, I fall in love with God for being unconventional. And being wise enough to be weak.
Thank God he wasn’t powerful as he entered into this world. He actually practiced what he later went onto preach.
Because by starting off in such a different way, he became the perfect example of what he wants us to understand.
HIS WAYS ARE NOT OUR WAYS.
AND THE WORLD’S WAYS THAT WE ALL STRIVE TO MEET.
THEY OFTEN HURT US.
So this Christmas, if you’re feeling down because…
Your tree is bare.
Your heart is lonely.
Your body is ailing.
Your lisp is embarrassing.
Your hair is falling out. (Mine actually is.)
Well then. He teaches us, that YOU are in a greater spiritual position than those that appear to have it all.
And you are the exact person he sent his tiny, delicate of a baby son for.
So that you would always know. He relates to being unconventional. In fact, I think he rather prefers it.
If he can have an innocent baby born in a manger (for crying out loud) turn into the savior for ALL of humanity. Just imagine what he can use your life for.
I pray every sweet baby reminds you of that this Christmas.